I just wanted to wish everyone a wonderful, safe, happy, healthy, prosperous and fun New Year.

Looking back on this last year, I see it’s been a roller coaster ride. Especially the last few months. Emotionally I was all over the place and it didn’t help that my depression had risen to really drag me out. I wasn’t in a really bad place per say but I found myself looking in my mind’s mirror and really examining myself. I found myself not so much in the usual pain that rises up when my depression decides to peek out but I wasn’t completely numb either. I was just emotionally exhausted. I could no longer lie to myself and ignore how worn out I was. I wasn’t taking care of myself emotionally the way I should. I let things build up for too long and it all just dragged me down. This wasn’t a normal depression episode where I could have just withdrawn for a day and it would be fine. This lasted for a few months and I needed time to heal, a lot of time to heal and re-examine my actions and other things.

I can say that I’m in a better place now, much better. It helps to have friends who can understand the situation. Empathy can help with the healing process. I’m still relearning how to breathe. I’m not that same eighteen year old who broke down and got stuck in her head for five years. I’m older for one thing, lol. And I’ve learned about myself that I didn’t know. It’s a constant process to learn, relearn and remind myself on ways to deal with my depression. I am not my depression. It is an aspect of me. It doesn’t control me if I don’t let it. I just have to keep reminding myself that it’s okay to stop and breathe, take time for me. The world won’t implode but not everyone will understand.

I’ve grown up a lot. I’ve learned a lot. I’m actually happy. Little by little I’m relearning to walk all over again and breathe on my own. I wouldn’t trade any of my experiences to be happier. Without them, these scars I carry on my heart from that breakdown have marked me. I didn’t let the world cave in around me this time I got up and kept going.  Not because I wanted to but because I had to. It’s my life and there are no stunt doubles who will take my place when it all gets too much.

I can say this song helps describe where I’m at now.

For this New Year, I won’t make resolutions. I’ll either forget about them or let them fall by the wayside due to laziness. Instead, I promise myself to take time out for myself ever once in awhile. To work hard and keep pushing myself and my writing and to finally lose my depression weight (which is a challenge cause I love food). I know I can do it. It’s all just like relearning to breathe, slow steps at first but once you get the hang of it, it’s all natural.

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Hi Everyone!

I have three contracts to annouce. *Grin* Changeling Press has contracted my Sex and Chocolate story Chocolate Bliss. And another Last Call Story: Dog Sled (which has yet to be written *panicking*). Also, Tease Publishing has contracted Orion’s Star which will be part of the Love’s Immortal Pantheon Vol 3. Anthology.

Right now I’m working on finishing up Chocolate Snake Bites before I turn back to a few WIPs that need to be finished, like oh say the next Tartan book and the next Hades Helmet book. *Grinning and ducking*

I’m so excited. Okay, back to work.

Se

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I wish everyone a Happy Holiday and may your New Year be prosperous and filled with joy and happiness!

Okay, so the Got Ink part of my post. Do you have a tattoo? Would you like to get one?

I already know I want at least three tattoos, one on both my wrists and this cute guy on my back:

http://media.photobucket.com/image/hoboken%20penguin/hubertina1966/hobokenpenguincubes.jpg?o=2

Not that exact picture. I’m sure you’re wondering why, right? Well, that’s the cartoon I watch that makes me feel better if I’m having a crappy day. Plus I love penguins. *Grin*

Moving on, I’d consider getting the Sanskrit symbol for Voice above my Chakra point on the back of my neck:

http://healing.about.com/od/chakraimages/ig/Chakra-Symbols/Throat-Chakra.htm

Being able to speak and voice your opinions and such is very important. For so long I never really expressed myself. This is a reminder to me that I have a voice and I have to use it. My opinions matter, at least to me they do.

And lastly this:

http://www.tattoosymbol.com/kanji/kanji-love.html

The Kanji for Love (Ai). For those of you who watch Naruto, you know that the character of Gaara has this etched into his forehead. I am a fan of the character but that isn’t the reason why I’d get the tattoo. Love is very important. And to love and respect one’s self is very important. Depression can really drag love for one’s self down and make a person feel unworthy. This reminds me that depression is only aspect of myself and that love is still there inside of me somewhere.I have an idea of where I’d like it be, but I won’t be telling. LOL

So what do you think?

If you have any tattoos can you share what they mean to you? And if you want to get one, what would it be?

Happy Holidays Everyone!

Selena

Currently listening to:

P!nk- Funhouse

Three Days Grace- Life Stars Now

Anouk- Three Days in a Row

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yHh-b0bDMyM

Florence and the Machine- Howl

Currently Reading:

Simple Need by Lissa Matthews

Current Release:

Vampiropolis (Collection) at Changeling Press

Coming Soon:

Prairie Dawgs: First Snow

Love’s Immortal Pantheon Vol. 3: Orion’s Star

Blood Claim: Tainted

Strange Hollow: Seducing a Wallflower

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(I tried my best to be spoiler free for those of you who haven’t yet experienced the awesomeness!)

There are some shows you watch just to be entertained.  These are superficial, pass-the-time programs that leave no mark on you.  In fact, by the end of the season, you have trouble recalling some of the episodes.  You do not relate to the characters at all.

Supernatural isn’t that show.

Take two brothers who have daddy issues, mix-in their opposites-are-fun-to-watch chemistry, put them on a road trip filled with ghost stories, pathos, demons, and the apocalypse, add a dash of gorgeous hunk of men and you’ve got a Thursday night full of awesome.  And lest this all should sound very glossy, it’s not.  This show has made me laugh because I love the characters so much.  This show has thrown me into the pit of despair because of the decisions those characters make.  This show has scared me because, unlike some mainstream TV programs, Supernatural refuses to pull its punches—there are always consequences for actions, and that’s the genius of the drama here.  We go through the hole to a dark, frightening, sometimes hilarious Wonderland with our avatars, the Winchester brothers, and we suffer right along with them.

I’m only a recent convert.  For some reason, I didn’t know how fantastic this show was at first.  But then I heard all the whisperings on the ‘net about this storyline or that character on Supernatural, and I was intrigued.  People would tell me that I need to tune in, so I obeyed.  And happy I am.

Why?  Here are a few reasons:
1.The storytelling doesn’t get any better than this.

The seasons all have their own arcs and climaxes, but the creator, Eric Kripke, had a full vision for the entire series.  That means we have a lot of satisfying continuity, such as the payoff of several mysterious elements that showed up in earlier seasons (for example, Croatoan and the Meg demon).  Also, along with the longer arcs, we get great twists on ghost stories and urban legends we’ve heard before, but they’re all solved Winchester style, with smart-ass cracks from brother Dean and puppy-dog sympathy from brother Sam.  The series treats its audience with respect; I mentioned that it pulls no punches, but it also strives to be clever.
2. The series never lingers too long on a mystery.

Supernatural knows just how and when to solve something.  Just when you think a plot is played out, another twist will come along and keep you very, very interested.
3. The writers have juevos.

They have the guts to explore things that might scare a lot of other staffs.  For those who’ve seen the series, I point in particular to Sam in season 4.  And Ruby.  And Bela.

4. And just in case you’re not yet convinced…

Dean and Sam are hot.

I recommend first renting the DVDs.  You’ll want to know everything about the Winchester brothers and what they’re facing.  Believe me, it’ll be worth the investment.  : )

Chris Marie Green, who writes urban fantasy, also creates romances as Crystal Green and writes a blog entry about Supernatural every time a new one airs (www.crystal-green.com).  Her latest release is The Path of Razors, Vampire Babylon, Book Five, which continues the adventures of Dawn Madison and her vampire hunting team.  Book Six, Deep in the Woods, will be released March 2, 2010.  To learn more, you can go to her Web site at www.vampirebabylon.com or follow her at Twitter at http://twitter.com/ChrisMarieGreen.

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Loose-Id has offered and I accepted a contract for the third Blood Claim Book Tainted. I’m so excited.

Se

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Hi Everyone!

I hope to announce some contract news soon. *Grin*

As for NaNoWriMo, I managed to get 46k in word count, so I’m pretty happy about that. I made a lot of headway with two of my WIPs. One of them is close to being 60k, the most I’ve ever written. I’ll be deleting the NaNoWriMo page since it’s over. I hope if you’re an aspiring author or published author that you made the word count you wanted.

And now, here’s your first peek at some new promo that I just got:

These are mini tote bags. I hope to get more soon, I’m also trying to figure out a contest involving my book series. *Grin*

What do you think? Remember there is a poll still up for this subject on promo:

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Also, I’ve registered for the Authors After Dark Convention which takes place in Sept. the 16th-19th in Secauscus, New Jersey. Will you be going?

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I’m also trying to figure out a good contest for this month. I know it will involve chocolate.

Have a great week everyone!

Se

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